Skip to main contentAccess keys help

[an error occurred while processing this directive]
BBC News
watch One-Minute World News
Last Updated: Tuesday, 9 November, 2004, 12:42 GMT
Tumour diary: Making plans again
BBC News science and technology writer Ivan Noble was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumour in August 2002.

Since then he has been sharing his experiences in an online diary.

I am stable, back in remission.

On Thursday I got the results of my last brain scan back.

I have no problem with brain scans. In fact I quite enjoy them.

For some reason I quite like being in confined spaces, and I like the noise the MRI machine makes - a kind of rhythmic metallic noise that I find relaxing.

"Go out and live a normal life," he said.
But I am terrified of going for the results.

This time it was not as bad as normal. We had taken our son along and he was keeping us and the rest of the assembled company entertained.

And when my oncologist gave us the news, it was better than we could have hoped for.

I would have been happy to hear that I was to continue on chemotherapy, which I thought the most likely option.

I was afraid that after various bouts of headaches and a lot of fatigue that I would be told things had got worse and that I might need another operation.

But instead he told me that things were stable, that I should come off chemo and get another scan in four to six months.

Neurosurgeon confirmed

I saw my neurosurgeon an hour later and he agreed.

"Go out and live a normal life," he said.

Last time I heard those words was in January 2003, I think.

I might even risk the first beer in six months.
That seems like half a lifetime away.

I am exhausted. All the tension I had been bottling up as the date and time approached has drained out of me and I feel like someone who has climbed a mountain, come back down again and then cried for an hour at the bottom.

I have all kinds of things wrong with me.

My sight will never get better, my hearing is starting to go on one side, and my ability to read and particularly write is starting to play tricks on me.

When I plucked up the courage to look at the scan myself this time, I saw that where the bit of brain which controlled my right visual field used to be is now a hole full of water.

It is a strange sight.

But I hear those words "stable" and "remission" and I feel so relieved I want to sleep for a week.

I might even risk the first beer in six months.

It is wonderful news. We can start making plans again.

Send your comments.


Your comments

Sounds like you should be opening the champagne
Chris, England
I have read your column for the last few months and wish you and your family well. Absolutely brilliant news today - a glass of beer??!! Sounds like you should be opening the champagne.
Chris, England

Fantastic news and about time too!! Have the beer and savour it! You deserve it. Love and best wishes for a long and happy future to you and your family.
Becky, UK

I have read your diary for the first time and it was lovely to read some good and excellent news. It made me realise how luck I am. Good luck in your future.
Mrs Tomlinson, Derbyshire

I've been reading your diary for some time now and was so pleased to read your fantastic news! I had tears in my eyes but a smile on my face after reading it, and wish you and your family every happiness.
Julie, UK

I am utterly overjoyed, delighted and relieved for you
Chris, USA
I (like half the online world) have been following your story since the beginning of the rollercoaster. I am utterly overjoyed, delighted and relieved for you. Enjoy a decent beer in England. I moved to the USA in April and it's the one thing about England I really miss.
Chris, USA

I am so pleased to hear your good news. Your diary updates have always touched me and I often think of you and your family. Celebrate with your loved ones and take care.
Clare, UK

I was so pleased and excited to see what you had written that I shrieked in the middle of my office! I have been following your diary religiously and I'm so happy for you and your family. Finally, some fantastic news for you that will allow you to look to the future. Good luck with everything!
Gill Ayres, UK

Dear Ivan, I now read about and analyse cancer drugs as part of my job, and I am routinely taken aback at the side effects I read about. I have read and enjoyed your diary for a long time now, but what is most moving is the response you draw from people. It is heartening to see people forget their problems and lives to rejoice in your good news and share your sorrow. The fact that you are bringing out this side in people in what are increasingly cruel and harsh times is very heartening. God bless you and your family.
Sanu, India

Make the most of every moment
Niamh Fitzgerald, Scotland
Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful! I can't tell you how happy for you I am. Hope you make the most of every moment from now on and I will try not to forget to do the same!
Niamh Fitzgerald, Scotland

I have been following your diary for some time now and all I can say is; it's marvellous news. I think we will all have a beer and think of you and your family. Absolutely delighted for you!
Valerie Flood, Scotland

I have read every single posting you have made since the start, and though I don't actually know you, I find myself overwhelmed with a sense of relief, as if I was receiving the news about my own brother. I find tears in my eyes thinking that your children have been given the hope of life with their father. May God Bless You.
Richard, UK

My very best wishes to you all
Andrea, England
Marvellous news, Ivan. Please now enjoy every moment and let your family see the father and husband that they knew was there. My very best wishes to you all, especially to your wife who has had to fight on all sides to keep your family whole. Take care and enjoy.
Andrea, England

Ivan, what wonderful, wonderful news. I always look for your column at the BBC website, and seeing this news has brightened up everything for me today. I am so happy for you! This gives me great hope in the face of my own darkness. Thank you for sharing, both the bad and the good, and do as the doctor said, go out and live your life!
Rikke Giles, Washington State, USA

All I want to say is this news is absolutely wonderful! Well done, you!! In this world of never ending depressing news, isn't it fantastic to get good news for a change? The very best of luck for the future!!!
Eileen Munnelly, England

Great news, makes my problems seem totally miniscule. You deserve the break. Go enjoy your kids and wife. Do the things you have been meaning to. Keep on living.
Gareth Munday, UK

Enjoy that beer, you've earned it
Andy Haywood, UK
Ivan, absolutely delighted to hear of your fantastic news! You can now look forward to enjoying Christmas with you two wonderful children, and enjoy that beer, you've earned it.
Andy Haywood, UK

Ivan, I'm so happy for you and your family. What a relief it must be to you all.
Sarah Gill, UK

What wonderful news! I have followed your story from the beginning and wanted to write something after each update, but the right words didn't come. But your news today is just fantastic and I wish you and your family all the best for the future.
Nicola, UK

This is the best news I have heard in ages, I am really pleased for you mate. Enjoy all life has to give you and have a fantastic Christmas with your wonderful family. This great news has put a great big smile on my face, God bless you and your family.
Julian Sharp, England

Finally, some good news. I am so happy for you and your family. Enjoy that beer
Grace, USA

Name
Your E-mail address
Country
Comments

The BBC may edit your comments and not all emails will be published. Your comments may be published on any BBC media worldwide.





TUMOUR DIARY

Dec 2004 - Jan 2005
 
Aug - Nov 2004
 
May-July 2004
 
Apr 2004
 
Mar 2004
 
Feb 2004
 
Jan 2004
 
Nov/Dec 2003
 
April-August 2003
 
March 2003
 
February 2003
 
January 2003
 
December 2002
 
November 2002
 
October 2002
 
September 2002
 



PRODUCTS AND SERVICES

News Front Page | Africa | Americas | Asia-Pacific | Europe | Middle East | South Asia
UK | Business | Entertainment | Science/Nature | Technology | Health
Have Your Say | In Pictures | Week at a Glance | Country Profiles | In Depth | Programmes
AmericasAfricaEuropeMiddle EastSouth AsiaAsia Pacific