Listen to Instant Sunshine's Money Box theme tune

"Money Matters" lyrics by Instant Sunshine

You may have money to spare, to loan or to lend
Accounts that you share, or squander or spend
Or cash you are saving stuffed inside some socks
Financial review is long over due
Don't let money stew; with profit in view
What you must do is tune to Money Box

Since the personnel cuts at banks have been so drastic
It's human contact that they're trying to slash
No more clerks with frowns or smiles
But machines with knobs and dials
Neither pleasant nor sarcastic
They just eat your piece of plastic
And then spit it out without dispensing cash

When the family doctor's looking apprehensive
And tells you you're unfit and overfed
To console your weeping wife
You insure your sickly life
It's outrageously expensive
But the covers comprehensive
And with luck you'll be quite wealthy when you're dead

You may have losses that mount or debt to defray
A healthy account or bills you must pay
Or cash stuffed in the sideboard with no locks
Some revenue's due and you can accrue
A penny or two with no more ado
What you must do is tune to Money Box

It's her majesty's tax inspectors dedications
That makes them chase your income tax and VAT
If you're moonlighting as well
They have bloodhounds that can smell
Any undeclared donation
That's avoiding due taxation
They'll sniff out their pound of flesh and all the fat

If you've cash in the house in some secret nook or cranny
Your broker would condemn this as a crime
But with gilts or shares or stocks
If your luck is on the rocks
Granny bond or bonded granny
You've a knack that's quite uncanny
To select the wrong investment every time

You may have money to spare, to loan or to lend
Accounts that you share, or squander or spend
Or cash you are saving stuffed inside some socks
Financial review is long over due
Don't let money stew; with profit in view
What you must do is tune to Money Box